nyc noise

~ always incomplete ~

drone party (partiful/palantir)

below update 2024-02-05; initial 2024-01-25 post here (on @nyc_noise), all images + text at bottom. i try to put stuff on site before (/mostly *instead of*) cop app, just still working out blog stuffs on new site!! relatedly, big thnx again to GREG & recurse pals, who made nyc noise way better & are not to blame for stuff i say!!!

(i'm not sharing everything i’ve *heard,* but plz continue to email me your gossip, contacts, links, & leads, subject “DRONE PARTY”)

TL;DR for the “apolitical”: partiful will be widely considered cringe af soon enough; quit now & lord it over yr friends forever 🥰

LONGER TAKEAWAY: i get that we’re all v tired & u don’t wanna wait 10 months for a new mobile-friendly platform bc your Important Party is soon –– but there’s a possible timeline that has drone party as ubiquitous as meta (links to compare series A funding), palantir’s ceo bragging about their integral role in gaza’s incineration, andreessen horowitz picking every president, & you in the streets protesting these f*ckin people…

so if u wanna use partiful so bad, make them TELL YOU that they think palantir’s f*cked, or communicate ANY real positions!!! y’all have been tagging them in stories sharing this post for the last 1.5 weeks, & all i’ve seen them say back is that they’re having a great time celebrating mardi gras ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ u don’t need to help the hella money'd spy tech co corner a market without asking a few questions!!

other things:

1) at least *6* partiful people are former palantir employees –– partiful's CEO, CTO, head of business & product operations, founding engineer, & 2 product engineers –– & that's out of only ~20 employees total, & just using public linkedins. i still don’t wanna get in the weeds about individual employees (paying rent is hard), but it’s not like, a ~fluke~

1b) no, they did *not* all work there at the same time –– unless partiful’s cofounders are lying about how long they worked for palantir. tho relatedly…

2) partiful's CEO made bb donations to political candidates in october 2020 that ID her as an "analyst" for palantir technologies; you can see those here or by searching her name at <opensecrets.org/donor-lookup>. [heavy-handed clarification bc idk if ppl got this:] partiful's ceo tells *us* she quit working for palantir in 2018 –– but in october of 2020, *she* said she worked for palantir on three donations.

3) if u think “all tech is compromised by evil money” then sweethearts while i agree there are lots of baddies out there & it’s a hard time to be alive, it is simply not true that every party app is ex-palantir co-founded, recruiting additional ex-palantir employees, & getting millions of dollars from palantir partners / alum while palantir takes out full-page pro-israel ads in the new york times during an ongoing genocide. the situation is in fact... ~unique.~

4) thing i’m *not* saying = "partiful is DEF misusing your data” (...yet lol). i AM saying this is a GREAT time to exert pressure on companies if they want your business; make them earn it!!!! ...& if they fail, chase them outta town!!!

5) partiful has offices in nyc & los angeles rn, but they’re hiring “party evangelists” (lol ew) in boston, chicago, & london (<jobs.lever.co>), & they have PILES OF CASH; again not tryina judge individual workers (i, too, would love to know how i’m gonna pay rent next month), but since these ppl are coming for yr scene soon enough… why help them with rollout for free?? resist adopting the platform & maybe down the line they will help pay your rent before fading into irrelevance!!

6) re: the “palumni” vc firm, their (unpaid, lol) internship job ad says “Yes, you will spend a lot of time on Partiful.” again that is… all i’m saying

7) you can look stuff up about partiful's latest $20 million in a series A round led by andreessen horowitz aka a16z –– & learn more about andreessen's quaint views in janus rose's vice article, "Major Tech Investor Andreessen Calls Architect of Fascism a 'Saint' in Unhinged Manifesto" –– but they aren’t saying where they got the first $7.4 million. aren’t you CURIOUS???? i am, personally, v curious

okay these are original images w/ full text beneath, sorry this is clunky!!!, just a workaround for now... (if i had $20 million i can promise u it would look *real* nice)

 

image 1 text: WE DON'T USE PARTIFUL: ON SURVEILLANCE TECH, DISABILITY (IN)JUSTICE, & HOW WAR CRIMES FUNDED A PARTY APP

image 2 text: I CALL PARTIFUL “DRONE PARTY" CUZ THE COFOUNDERS OF THE "PARTIES FOR HOT PEOPLE” APP WORKED FOR, & STILL GET MONEY FROM, THIEL'S MOST MURDEROUS BABY, PALANTIR

image 3 text: IF YOU’VE NEVER HEARD THESE NAMES, PALANTIR IS WORTH A SEARCH; THINK NSA SPY SH*T, EVIL IN ISRAEL, ICE / DEPORTATIONS, "PREDICTIVE POLICING." THE "PALUMNI” VC FIRM FUNDS FORMER PALANTIR EMPLOYEE STARTUPS –– LIKE EVENT INVITE / SOCIALS PLATFORM PARTIFUL

image 4 left shows a screenshot of partiful's homepage: purple-y background, "INSPO" link next to login, picture of phone screenshowing someone's partiful event page talking about "beliebers." main partiful screenshot text is "Highkey parties, lowkey planning; the sexiest way to get all your guests on the same page (literally)"
image 4 text: YES, THE COFOUNDERS OF *THIS* WORKED AT PALANTIR FROM 2014-2018; WITH THAT TRAINING, JUST ASK SNOWDEN OR THE CIA OR IOF: PARTIFUL CAN DEF TRACK YOUR SEXY GUESTS!!!

image 5 shows a bunch of screenshots of palantir headlines, with “PALANTIR: BAD” in angled block letters over them. the mostly & fully-visible headlines & subheadings read:
• “CAMBRIDGE ANALYTICA IS BAD, BUT PALANTIR IS FUCKING TERRIFYING. With its vehicle tracking software, the company Peter Thiel co-founded knows you ran that headlight” (it's not written on slide, but this one’s prolly my favorite lol)
• “PALANTIR ENABLES IMMIGRATION AGENTS TO ACCESS INFORMATION FROM THE CIA. According to a set of funding documents, ICE agents can use a Palantir system to access data held by agencies that possess highly classified intelligence, including the CIA.”
• “PETER THIEL’S PALANTIR WAS USED TO BUST RELATIVES OF MIGRANT CHILDREN, NEW DOCUMENTS SHOW. Palantir previously claimed its software was strictly involved in criminal investigations as opposed to deportations. This was false.”
• “Palantir: the 'special ops' tech giant that wields as much real-world power as Google. Peter Thiel's CIA-backed, data-mining firm honed its 'crime predicting' techniques against insurgents in Iraq. The same methods are now being sold to police departments. Will they inflame already tense relations between the public and the police?”
• “Israel-linked CIA-funded Palantir goes public, making espionage mainstream. The firm is closely linked to the CIA and Israel, while standing accused of multiple counts of human rights violations.”
• “Palantir's CEO Finally Admits to Helping ICE Deport Undocumented Immigrants. Palantir has tried to downplay its role in ICE's detainment and deportation of immigrants for years, but Alex Karp said the quiet part loud at Davos.”
• “Palantir powers Ice immigration raids, the defense sector and police surveillance. It is the big tobacco of the tech world” (…okay yeah that’s another pretty harsh burn)

image 6 text: PALANTIR'S SURVEILLANCE TECH FUELS DEBILITY: THE SYSTEMIC PROCESS OF UNEVENLY-DELIVERED INJURY & BODILY EXCLUSION. ISRAEL DEBILITATES VIA GUNS & BOMBS & BORDERS (& MORE), IMPAIRING MOBILITY THROUGH CHECKPOINTS & BLOWN LIMBS, & THE HELP OF AMERIKKKAN PALANTIR'S "PREDICTIVE" POLICING, MAPPING SOCIAL MEDIA + NETWORKS TO CENSOR & DETAIN. PARTIFUL MADE MILLIONS FROM THIS WAR MACHINE'S ALUM CLUB: *BRUTAL*

image 7 text: I TOO LIVE IN A WAR MACHINE & KNOW THE STRUGGLE TO ATONE; I WISH PARTIFUL LUCK EARNING OUR PATRONAGE! MY IDEAS:
• CLARIFY STANCE ON GENOCIDE AS PALANTIR INCREASES SUPPORT TO ISRAEL
• *REQUIRE* ACCESS INFO AS TINIEST GESTURE FOR THE *MILLIONS* DISABLED BY PALANTIR'S TERROR-REACH
THE LEAST U CAN DO IS TELL PEOPLE IF THEY *COULD* ENTER THE PARTY –– IF IT WEREN'T BEING HELD ON THEIR NECKS!

image 8 left shows weirdly ad-copy-vibe headlines & subheadings about partiful; the atlantic’s reads “The Internet, but for Hot People”; the new york times, “Is This the Least Cringe Option to Get People to Your Party?” & the washington post, “Partiful wants Gen Z to move in a new social direction this New Year’s Eve”
image 8 text: OF COURSE WITH FREE ADVERTISING LIKE THIS, MAYBE NO ONE WILL MIND IF PARTIFUL JUST KEEPS USING THEIR *MILLIONS* TO TALK "VIBES" & “INSPO" & ~CHIPOTLE GIVEAWAYS~ ... BUT MY HOPE IS THE YOUTH WON’T FORGIVE THE WAR SPOILS

image 9 text: IF YOU'RE READING THIS ON THE COP APP (INSTA), YOU ALREADY HAVE ENOUGH SURVEILLANCE TECH. IF YOU’VE SEEN / SENT PARTIFUL INVITES, TELL YOUR FRIENDS: PARTIFUL / PALANTIR = COP SH*T …& WE DON'T GIVE OUR NUMBERS TO COPS!!!